Day 10 Month 2 - What I need

I have had a rather down day, today I took the day off work and went to see the Doctor, this is not a new thing because since before Christmas I have been coughing. I had one bout of bronchitas and then another and after x-rays and sputum checks - which were normal - I have still been coughing, only now, I have no sense of smell and my ears hurt. The doctor today has told me that I have YET another bout of bronchitas and have been prescribed a third batch of anti-biotics.
So I asked the doctor am I feeling down and unable to cope because of the infection or is the infection not healing because I am feeling down and unable to cope. Honestly, they don't know and we will have to see how I feel after this batch of anti-biotics.

However feeling down is not something new to me and when I am down I seem to have remarkable moments of clarity, especially since I like to write things down. I have on this desk some writing, I have in my bag a book which periodically get's pulled out and scribbled in and in the car I have two books which have been written in, in times when I have simply had nothing better to do. I looked at a page that I wrote a while ago (no date on my writing) and I must have been reading one or other self help book at the time but this was written well before I read Paul McKenna. So let me share a snippet with you. Only because I usually feel down when the victim part of my ego rears it's ugly head and being in the imortal words of that crazy german songstress from Blazing Saddles "Tired of being so tired.".

What do I need to know right now to make my life and myself perfect?
This is a huge question and the answer is so complex that it's probably going to take me forever to answer it but here goes.
Wow, this really making me think long and hard because the first thing I did was ask myself what do I already know?
I am fairly well educated, and very well read, so I would consider myself quite intelligent, but there have been lots of successful people who are really not well educated nor well read, so what did they do in their lives to achieve success or at least what I feel is their achievement of success?
These days every life coach and inspirational speaker is saying that you can do, be or have everything you want in life. It seems then like a fair assumption that if I have everything I want, everything I want to do, have and be must be the answer to my initial question.
The answer then is not so complex, because then all I need to know is what do I want to do? What do I want to be? What do I want to have? So once I have all this information, I should be on my way to perfection. In simpler terms I am going to have to make a list, of things I want to do, be and have, and in true life coach style I am going to call it a goals list and not a wish list.

Join us again tomorrow for a gripping installment
In love and light.

"Transformation requires sacrifice"

Well another day has come and is almost gone, a rather uneventful day except that I have been reading Dan Brown's Lost Symbol, the concepts that he writes about are so fascinating and so New Age that of course I have heard most of it before. I have read "The Secret", I have read bits of the Kabalion, I am familiar with terms like polarity and lessons like "as above so below". The one thing that I read, that is seeming to haunt me are the words "Transformation requires sacrifice" of course these words were written for the baddie, BUT, they haunt me because they are true.
I am overweight and if I want to loose the excess I have to sacrifice. Not the blood but the bad habits, the large dinners just before bed, the extra piece of cake my kids haven't finished eating, the chocolates, the sweets, the chips. If I want to transform from an overweight 40 year old, I HAVE to sacrifice all these types of things.
Here again I believe that my total lack of passion holds me back from achieving even the most sensible and healthy of physical states.
Bad habits learned over the years are very hard to break and yet good habits can be broken seemingly without effort.
I really think it's time to exert a little control over my mind and body. I have actually found that Noetic Science is an actual science, relatively new, the concepts are age old and have been preached for thousands of years (before Christ), Paul McKenna uses neurolinguistic programming to help you achieve your dreams and desires, this by the way is just a really modern term for good old fashioned meditation. The power to keep your mind clear of all clutter is the key to achieving you desires... Or is it?
Something else I wish that was as clear cut as death and bloody taxes!!