The Major difference between a wish list and a goals list is that wishes are never finite. Ideally what I want is to create a list that I can see my progress on. I once heard someone say that you should "keep your goals in concrete but the route to achieving them in the sand" or something like that. I am going to create a goals list that has an indefinate action to achievement and a final stead fast achievement date.
The problem with getting an idea like this is that I get all fired up and want to make a list and then the achievement dates are really unrealistic. I know that if I miss a deadline, I am going to get dispondent then loose interest, the other thing I need to worry about is that I don't over-extend the achievement dates and loose interest or get bored, knowing myself, like only I do, it's these things that usually keep me from achieving my goals.
I am going to jot down a few of the things I want to be.
1. I want to be a best selling author.
2. I want to be a great mother and wife.
Now what do I want to have?
1. Two happy, healthy children
2. A happy household in a lovely period style house where the family is happy and carefree
3. A million pounds in the bank.
Moving away from writing of the past I feel that I can elaborate on these goals.
A best selling author - time and time again, I have tried to keep my interest long enought to have a decent amount of writing, but thinking about it, if I transcribed all my writing into a document and then sort it out into some clarifying order, I probably have enough ink on paper to have a book, a best seller though? I guess someone else will have to be the judge of that.
A great mother and wife - no-one ever tells you what the responsibility of raising kids is really like. You only hear how wonderful they are, I must admit that I am really struggling with being a great mom, and I judge myself very harshly in this respect I worry about the emotional well being far more than their physical well being because let's face my kids have everything they need by way of clothes and food and toys and education, but what damage am I doing? I shout and say mean things sometimes and although quick to apologise and cuddle my children, in that moment where I am not thinking I am truely worried about screwing them up. On the wife front, however I have a marvelous husband who puts up with a lot of my nonsense and sticks around because as much as I do not believe it myself, he loves me.
Two happy, healthy children - I like to think - probably naively - that most of the time my children are happy and thank goodness they are very healthy. I am always truely amazed at their capacity to forgive and give unconditional love.
A happy household in a lovely preiod style house where the family is happy and carefree - This stems from a not so deep rooted resentment that we are still renting a house, I do not call it home because we have been unable to make it a home, we have not been allowed to put holes in the walls so we have been unable to hang any of the things we so dearly loved when we were in SA. Family photos, Robs autographed sports shirts, these took pride of place in every room in our home in Jhb. We are unable to have pets, hell we are not even allowed to paint over the colour of despair (a grey of some discription) in the entrance hall.
A million pounds in the bank - Wouldn't that just solve every single physical need/ issue? I know it's probably unrealistic but then that's my ego wondering where we'd get it from, and that proves that I really have no true belief in the power of the universe to deliver it. A million pounds in the bank though would not help me to emotionally support my children, with an instict to give them what they want to keep them physically happy, this amount of money will probably screw things up even more.
In love and light.
No comments:
Post a Comment